LONDON, ENGLAND – SEPTEMBER 01: Lewis Capaldi performs live at The O2 Arena on September 01, 2022 in … [+]
In a little more than a month, Lewis Capaldi will release his sophomore album Broken by Desire to Be Heavenly Sent, which is easily one of the most highly anticipated CDs of 2023. Ahead of the album drop, Netflix
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“Initially, we were talking about making something that just tracked the second album,” explained director Joe Pearlman, “but there was obviously a lot more going on with Lewis.” The film the team set out to make was not the one fans will see. “It became a very different story as we got further into the process,” said VP of Films at BMG Stuart Souter.
How I’m Feeling Now does make sure to educate viewers who might not know Capaldi, covering the No. 1 hits, the Grammy nominations, his sold out tours and even his trademark sense of humor. But it goes much deeper than many music docs. It shows how human the superstar is and the many, many struggles he faces due to his success and the pressure he faces now. The final product is as much about the music as it is about his internal issues and how he perseveres as the world waits on him.
Writing and recording the sophomore full-length is always difficult for any musician who has hit it big, as expectations are outsized and time is ticking away. That struggle should be enough to flesh out a documentary, but for Capaldi, the situation was even crazier. He went from performing for tens of thousands of fans to sitting in a tiny shed in his parent’s house in rural Scotland, as the pandemic forced him to retreat as he worked. That kind of switch-up would be enough to throw anyone–let alone someone who is already in a delicate mental state.
Filming began years ago, just as Capaldi was becoming popular (and even before then). He and his team had been documenting his work, life, and journey, just in case, which is not unusual for artists living in the always-on, content-focused new world. His team brought the idea for a documentary to BMG, who jumped at the idea. “We were immediately super keen to make a film about Lewis,” explained Souter. “We were looking for a millennial breakthrough artist subject matter, and Lewis’ story has been exceptional in so many ways.”
It’s a no-brainer for a company like BMG to agree to produce and fund a movie about a mega star, but where the project went, few could have predicted. Pearlman signed on early to direct, but he says wasn’t sold until he actually met Capaldi himself. “I wondered if someone so young, so early in their career, could sustain a story worthy of telling right now,” he commented. During our conversation, Pearlman talked about how some star-driven projects become fluff very quickly, as artists try to control their own image…but that is not the case with How I’m Feeling Now.
“As we carried on filming, the more the narrative started to unfold in front of us,” Pearlman shared. As everything from expectations to deadlines to the pandemic wore on Capaldi, it became clear that the story that everyone thought was going to be the focus–which BMG and Capaldi’s team had agreed upon–was not what How I’m Feeling Now would actually be about. This is where trust kicked in. “We didn’t see anything for a while, but we certainly knew that the tone was changing quite quickly,” commented Souter.
Some companies wouldn’t let a producer or director deviate from the original plan, but BMG was open to what was happening–especially if it was both compelling and the truth. Pearlman shared that when he spoke to the music conglomerate about the new storyline, it was well-received: “Thankfully it wasn’t much of a negotiation.”
As the pandemic settled in, the crew sent a camera to Capaldi, and much of the documentary was actually filmed by his parents and the singer himself out of necessity. Later on, when it was safe(r) to do so, Pearlman and his partner Alice Rhodes moved up to Scotland to be closer to him and to complete the project. Initially, when the director signed on, everyone thought the movie might be finished in a year. That did not end up being the case.
Everything takes longer in a global health crisis, but that wasn’t the only reason why How I’m Feeling Now ended up wrapping much later than anticipated. The producers didn’t want to only present Capaldi suffering–they wanted him to have his own redemption in the end. For him, that meant getting back out on stage in his element, which simply wasn’t possible for quite some time.
There are times when How I’m Feeling Now becomes difficult to watch. As the film progresses, Capaldi develops an anxious tic, which is later diagnosed as Tourette’s Syndrome. It quickly becomes worse and worse, and the singer-songwriter is clearly in pain. Those working on the movie worried that adding a camera to the experience may have been contributing to the issue. At one point, Souter even questioned, “Are you adding to the problem by focusing on that?”
In one particularly heartbreaking moment, Capaldi stands on stage under a spotlight in front of thousands of people, and mid-concert he’s forced to stop the show as he convulses in front of a silent audience. It’s truly devastating, but it’s inclusion says a lot about those making the movie…including the subject himself.
Despite it all, Capaldi never resisted presenting his true life, no matter how unflattering it may look on the screen. “The camera was never told to go away,” remarked Pearlman. Souter revealed that the musician “was very, very clear that he didn’t want to shy away from it.” And so, filming progressed…at least for a while.
At one point, the documentary does stop for a while, as Capaldi’s mental and physical health had deteriorated to a point when he had to seek professional help. The fact that the cameras were shut down might seem counterintuitive when it comes to making a movie about someone’s struggles, but sometimes, it’s simply what has to happen. When the musician’s team told Pearlman that everything was on pause, he says the conversation was “difficult,” but that ultimately, there was no other choice. “It was more a case of, if Lewis doesn’t take a break and get himself together…then not only are we not going to have a documentary, we’re not going to have an album, and you’re not making anything about anyone,” he said.
Once Capaldi’s health degraded, everyone around him–even those working on the movie–adapted. “As things changed for Lewis, our roles changed as well from wanting to support him” shared William Kennedy, Vice President, Strategy & Business Development for BMG. Everyone waited for the star to get better, which did take some time–which itself only added to the delayed completion. But when he returns and sits in front of the camera again, it’s clear that the break was worthwhile, as Capaldi seems to be doing much, much better. He’s still as hilarious as ever, and his comeback is even sweeter than he expected.
In addition to playing to some of the biggest crowds of his career, Capaldi’s fears that his new work won’t be received as well are quickly assuaged. The viewer gets to watch as he learns that his first single from Broken by Desire to Be Heavenly Sent, the ironically-titled “Forget Me,” goes right to No. 1 in the U.K. It’s an inspiring moment for everyone, and it shows that all that work, all the struggles, and even all that extra time, was worth it.
Source: https://www.forbes.com/sites/hughmcintyre/2023/04/07/lewis-capaldis-candid-netflix-documentary-is-equal-parts-funny-and-difficult-to-watch/